This is going to sound hokey but religion teaches us to love unconditionally. I believe you can love your spouse unconditionally. If they cheat, yes you will be upset and you will lose trust and respect. But you will still love them. It will hurt you because it betrayed your LOVE. If you feel that you would still love them after they hurt you like this, that is unconditional love.Do you think it鈥檚 possible to have unconditional love for your spouse?
There's a book called the ';Love Dare'; and it teaches you to have unconditional love for your spouse. This is how love should be. If they are your spouse you've chosen them among all others to spend the rest of your life with. Hopefully you've chosen someone that wouldn't hurt you. If they slip up and do something to hurt you, you should figure out why, not just throw in the towel and give up. They were good enough for you to marry...
And if you love someone with unconditional love they should feel that love constantly and would have no desire to sway from the marriage.
Unconditional love is something you have for your children, not your spouse.
Unconditional love for a spouse means he/she can do anything they want to you and you will always love and forgive your spouse. So if your spouse cheats on you, beats you, treats you horribly, makes every day or your life h*ll, you will forgive, love, and stay with them.
To have unconditional love for a spouse would require you to have something mentally wrong with you and for you to be a fool with no love or respect for yourself.
Unconditional love is possible, but not an unconditional relationship. That is for doormats. That is the problem with marriages today. Woman blame the problems with their marriages and society in general on men. But the problem is the woman. Men have been the same since the beginning of time. But women used to be stronger. They used to have conditions. Here is a quote from a book in my collection:
';History shows us that one of the strongest factors in determining whether or not men will be barbarians or become civilized creatures is the absence or presence of strong, confident women. In the late 1800s, men rushed to the new opportunities found in the American West. Without the presence of significant women in these men's lives--women who demanded a certain standard of behavior--it did not take long for the West to become known as the ';Wild West.';
';By the early 1900s, however, the men of the West had been tamed, becoming responsible husbands, fathers, and members of their community. What made the difference? Women came and demanded that men behave in a civilized manner if they wanted them as their wives. So they did.';
';These women took the position of, you want me--you behave in a way worthy of me.';
';All healthy marriages contain strong women. I hear women complaining about their ';man'; staying out until 2am drinking or entertaining girlfriends. They ask in an insecure voice, ';What should I do?'; And I sit there asking myself, ';Why don't I treat my wife like that?'; The answer is always the same: ';Because she would kill me.'; I think of all the men I know who have good marriages and I ask myself, ';Why don't they stay out all night and chase other women?'; The answer is always the same: because their wives would kill them.';
For more info on the subject, read the book, ';Laugh your way to a better marriage'; by Mark Gungor. (Quotes taken from pages 83-90)
PS, in response to some of the other answers on here, I just wanted to mention that the book goes on to say if we don't have a conditional relationship with our children as well, we will raise ';hellions';. Haha.
It's not possible for me to have that for anyone....there are always conditions for me. Cheating on me, lying to me, abusing me, etc would be things that would cause my love to end. Someone who would do those things doesn't deserve my love.
I don't believe in unconditional love, other than parent to child...and even that isn't something that occurs all the time (and I have no kids).
i have to agree with BettyM. i have unconditional love for my kids but not my husband. there are few things he could do to break the love i have for him. abuse being at the top of that list. but if we were having hard times or whatever issues arise i would stand by him and be his support for everything except sex crimes. i think anything can be worked through (besides those two things) and it would not change my love.
edit: if it isn't clear by sex crimes i am NOT talking about cheating.
No. There is always something a spouse can do that could turn you against them. Possibly even hate them. The only person it is possible to have unconditional love for is your child. I would love my children and grandchildren regardless of what they did. I may not approve, but I would still love them.
No. I do think that we would work through most anything though. We already have worked through some major low points! But it has to be no, because if for some horrid reason he intentionally hurt one of our children there is no way I could get past that. Thank goodness I don't have to worry about it though!
I used to think I could love my spouse unconditionally...but after I had my kids...I realized a parent/child relationship is unconditional. No matter what they do, say...I love them with all my heart...there would be times my husband would piss me off for days...so I can't say that, that's unconditional...you know?
Yes it is. Because you love them under all circumstances. The ONLY reasons I could think of that you wouldn't, would be if they cheat on you OR if there's abuse of any kind. Then your love could vary from being ';unconditional';....best to you...:)
Love is a choice. It's not just a feeling that we feel. So when you said ';I do';, you made a CHOICE to love your spous. It is possible, but only through God's grace, cuz we all make mistakes and let eachother down.
Yes, TRUE love is always unconditional.
I will always love my wife no matter what she has done will do.
do i believ it, yes.
some people do love their spouse...no matter what they've done!
For me?... nope.
there are always a few conditions..
cheating..hurting my kids..physical abuse..
there are things i would not stick around for!
some people do, even when the spouse do really mean things.
I have too much self respect to have unconditional love for a spouse if they do horrible things.....(i.e.cheat, abusive, etc. etc.)
When you say your yows that's exactly what you are saying ! ';unconditional'; in so many words! and you are suppose to understand the meaning !
Nope, but it's pretty close to it. There is only one thing that he could do to make me stop loving him, and that would be cheating.
Nowhere near possible.
yeah, but that will wear off. nothing unconditional last forever. for reals.
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